happy anniversary, baby, i've got you on my miiiiind!

hooray for six years!!!

i planned to scan more photos from our wedding, but my scanner was having personal issues...so i gave it the night off. without pay, of course.

pray big for your marriage

I have recommended the book Pray Big for your Marriage before but thought I'd give it some more free ad space. I am moving ever so slowly through it and tailoring the prayer suggestions for my marriage. And...I am already seeing answers to my prayers. I am humbled by God's goodness and by the joy of committing to praying more than just "bless us, God."

Some examples of suggested intercessions in the book include praying that
- you and your spouse won't settle for mediocrity in your marriage,
- your marriage would mirror God's everlasting love and lovingkindness,
- God will expose and remove any barriers that keep you from knowing all the joy He intends for your marriage, and
- you will love Jesus MORE than you love your spouse, etc.


I'd like to be transparent here...not because I think my words are going to be super exciting or profound, but because I know how incredibly helpful the honest sharing of others is to me.

I've mentioned before that I am not the prayer warrior I long to be. I know that God is our Abba (Romans 8:15) and some people converse with Him easily throughout the day just as they would their earthly Dad. However, for some reason I always think of Isaiah's encounter with the Lord (Isaiah 6) and feel like I need to be locked in my closet, face on the ground, and going through the ACTS steps in order to pray. Not for ritual but for reverence! Think Wayne and Garth, "I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy."

BUT...I know that God meets me where I am, and He's been using this book to encourage me in prayer.


I have been praying the intercession listed above asking God to "expose barriers." Let me just say that the first day I prayed this, I did so with the acknowledgement that I am so often a barrier...THE barrier. God must have agreed and started revealing very specific ways that a change in me would lead to more joyful intimacy in my marriage.

Keep this in mind: If you read the account of Adam and Eve in the garden, God gives the instruction about the "forbidden fruit" BEFORE He makes Eve. There is no mention of God reiterating His words to Eve. Perhaps He did, or perhaps Adam shared the news and she was expected to trust him...we don't know. But we do know that Eve was deceived by satan and then gave the fruit to Adam, who ate of it in direct transgression (1 Tim 2:14). However, after they BOTH ate of the fruit, God addressed Adam. Nevermind that Eve ate first. Nevermind that she gave the fruit to her man. God addressed Adam.

I am a girl led by emotions and sometimes volatile ones at that! If up to me we would probably have started an orphanage in our guest room, given our entire savings to combat human trafficking, and be trekking to Mexico every weekend to build homes for those need. All good stuff, right? But is it God's will for our family?

Now because I believe that God designed the husband to lead the family (1 Cor 11:3), I pray often for Scott to have wisdom in guiding our family and our business. Yet, even when not meaning to, I often try to impress my ideas and my timing on him rather than trusting that He is surrendered to and being led by God. I mean, why haven't we sold all of our belongings yet? There is a baby in africa who needs milk!

I think most husbands, like mine, really want to make their wives happy...and perhaps sometimes men can succumb to the desires (or nagging, whatever the situation may be) of their wives in order to achieve this. Is this what Adam did? Did he disobey God in an attempt to make Eve happy? I don't know but I do know that, by Divine design, Scott is responsible to God for our family. Remember how God addressed Adam?

My guess is that we can expect to see more joy in our marriages when we fully commit to praying for our husbands to be surrendered to and led by God and then trusting that it is actually happening. May we be more conscious of what we ask of our husbands...praying that their desire to obey God will supercede their desire to make us happy. When God calls the name of your husband, may it be to say, "Well done, good and faithful servant..."

We Picture {This}

I have been invited to participate in a "mamarazzi" photo blog!!! If you enjoy looking at amazing photos of super cute kids, click your way on over to We Picture {This}!

vacation wrap up

Wonderful trip! Matthew slept like a champ (at least we think he did...we put the microwave vent on high speed so he could have danced the cha cha all night and we wouldn't have known). Not kidding, but he was pretty much getting about 12 hours per night + a nap, which is totally unheard of! I was stoked thinking that we were getting into a new&improved sleep schedule...until he's been awake EARLY both mornings since returning home. Just one more reason to move to CA, right?

We lounged at the pool:

I totally blew out this photo but thought it looked cool anyway..

We flew a kite at the beach and had more fun in the sand:

We visited a park:

and we pretty much just relaxed our tails off. It was great...and did I mention that Matthew slept well? Yeah, it was GREAT! Plus, Scott and I had our evenings free from normal "tasks" so I was blessed to enjoy his company. Plus, I read the book From Congress to Brothel which I received from Shared Hope Int. and it led to a lot of prayer...which I loved. Plus, we saw pelicans...I was SO hoping to because they are such magnificent birds...huge!!!

Oh, yeah, and plus Matthew slept well!

having fun...wish you were here!

Our trip has been fantastic! M has been a real trooper...such a good traveler! We've explored the resort, sang loudly at a FREE Phil Wickham concert and, of course, HIT THE BEACH!

When leaving the concert we were talking about going back to the condo to go to sleep. M said, "NO!" I said, "Daddy is going to go to sleep, and mama is going to go to sleep...what are you going to do?" He replied, "Eat pizza! Eat ice cream!" I think he is a teenager trapped in a 36" body.

The gift of using our friend's timeshare has been a blessing. The resort is gorgeous, and we love being near the beach. Believe me, we are REALLY enjoying our stay. I must say though that as I have walked the grounds, I've been a little heartbroken at the indulgence...the luxury. I've been asking God to not allow these finer things to numb my senses, harden my heart, and distort my priorities because, believe me, I like this stuff. The sparkling white linens, the lush gardens, the 100million channels on cable. I think God answered today in an email from dear Rebecca. She sent me this link. He's good, isn't He?

Here are some photos from today at the beach...





This poor seal must have been pretty sick to let me get this close (no zoom). He was right near the Lifeguard office, so I believe they called for help.

post lite

Recently I've been serving up some pretty full-bodied posts, so thought I'd give you a "post lite!"

M bolted through the kitchen the other day (as fast as a toddler can bolt), and I asked, "Where are you going?" Without missing a beat, he answered, "Home Depot!"

I just got this new workout video and chose it specifically because it is broken down into five 10 minute sections. With M's nap being so short, I need a quick fix...I just do a section here and there. So far I like it and, while I haven't felt the "pain", I am seeing a little "gain." But the unexpected blessing in it all is that between the sections you have time to grab a handful of Robin Eggs Easter candy! You know, just in case you need some extra protein....because eggs are protein.

Pray Big for Your Marriage by Will Davis, Jr. is a book I am currently reading. LOVE IT! I seriously suck at praying, and this book offers the guidance I need. I know...praying should be as easy as talking to someone you love because you are talking to Love Himself, but it's just really difficult for me. This book is helping me be diligent in seeking God for my marriage.

Speaking of talking, I recently got a phone call from a CELEBRITY! Yes, THE Stefanie of Ni Hao Y'all rang me up the other day! Now let me say that I suck at talking on the phone (hmmm...notice a pattern with my rotten communication skills). For some reason I never know when it is my turn so I am either silent (awkward) or interrupting (awkward and rude), and I pretty much just hate it. BUT...it was THE Stefanie of Ni Hao Y'all, so I sucked it up and answered my phone. Let me just say that she is even more gracious and wonderful "in person" than I imagined. PLUS, if you don't already know, she is headed back to China for her FIFTH ADOPTION (nine children total)...she is utterly remarkable.

Soon we will be trippin' out to CA for M's first time at the beach! Some dear friends have blessed us with their time share, so we are EXCITED!!! I used to live in San Diego, and I miss it dearly so going back gets me all hyped up...or did I just eat too many Robin Eggs?

Here are some pics I took this morning. M is just way too fast for me. He will not hold his head still for even a half-second. So I got some soft photos, but I really like them! He looks handsome in his outfit, which we bought while in Taiwan.


this is what i get when i say "SMILE!":

grace...joy for mourning

I sat outside the church in my little black Scoupe and watched the raindrops trickle down my windshield in unison with the tears trickling down my cheeks. I didn't see the other car pull up across the street, but suddenly he got out and, with his groomsmen by his side, rushed into the door to escape the rain.

My heart ached.

I knew he didn't love me....not the way a girl with a wedding dress stuffed in her backseat wants to be loved. Nor did I love him that way I guess. But I got out of my car, carefully gathered my dress, and tiptoed through the puddles to the church.

Fast forward: Scott and I watched Fireproof the other night. There is a part where one of the characters reveals that, due to his failed marriage, he carries a scar on his heart. His statement lingered with me because I can relate.

Jon and I were married soon after graduating college. Chalk it up to the ignorance of youth...or the sin of prideful hearts...or a comedy of errors, but we then divorced a few months shy of our 4th anniversary.

A scar on my heart.

That is what sin does. It diseases the healthy. Corrupts the innocent. Cuts with a knife so jagged that a scar is inevitable...

but God.

When I became a follower of Christ, I was forgiven of all my sins, and yet I began to see the reality of my sins in a new way. Suddenly I viewed my marriage/divorce not only as an issue between Jon and myself but as an offense against my God. My selfish, prideful, bitter treatment of Jon was not only mean to him, but it caused anguish to my Savior, the One who paid for those sins. As eye-opening as this was, it oddly enough did not produce feelings of human guilt but instead of godly mourning...the kind of grief that doesn't camp out on your failures but moves to a place of gratitude and praise for His forgiveness for those failures.

May we mourn to think that we have pierced the Savior, that we have transgressed against a God so good, and a Redeemer so generous. -C.H. Spurgeon

but grace.

To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified. Isaiah 61:3


I love this promise in the OT. God says that for those who truly mourn their sin, He will indeed comfort them. As those who accept God's forgiveness through Christ, no longer do we wear the ashes of mourning; by His grace He exchanges our grief for joy. God is faithful on His part; however, I think that often we are unfaithful in looking for the ways in which He imparts this grace. By acknowledging His favor and responding in praise, the last part of the verse becomes true in our lives...THAT HE MIGHT BE GLORIFIED.

A while back God showed me grace in the form of an email from Emily, Jon's wife. Upon learning of my mom's cancer, she wrote to extend her sympathies and encouragement. Since her mother is a cancer survivor, she offered the comfort that comes only from experience and the prayers that come from a knowing heart. We became fast friends because we're both so cool (the fact that I just typed that sentence proves otherwise) and because she always gives good mama advice (hmmm...the friendship seems a little one-sided, huh?).

Emily didn't have to email me, in fact, she probably had every reason not to...humanly speaking. Her act was one of unmerited favor...God's grace working through her. I see this as a picture of God giving "beauty for ashes." To me it is amazing that, while Jon and I had no interest in God while we were married, God had interest in us. While we didn't glorify Him in our marriage, He blessed us both with new godly marriages. We did not deserve His unmerited favor, but God abundantly lavished it on us...what joy!

This is grace. And it is soothing and healing and renewing.

Is your heart scarred? Do you mourn your sin? Go to God and let His sweet salve of grace cover your wounds. And then, in a garment of praise, glorify the Giver of all grace.

For the LORD God [is] a sun and shield; The LORD will give grace and glory; No good [thing] will He withhold from those who walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11