NEW POST ON PRIVATE BLOG!
As mentioned in the previous post, I've been thinking a lot about M's heart...spurred on by his behavior of late. We know that behavior is an outflow of the heart (Proverbs 4:23) and that, without an internal change, any external changes may be helpful to our sanity momentarily but not truly beneficial for the child eternally.
While each parent should seek God's will and wisdom for their parenting through prayer and scripture, I always love hearing what God is doing in the lives of others...so, if anyone is interested in a discussion, here are my questions. You don't have to answer ALL of the questions to participate!
- What do you believe the parent's role is in regards to the child's relationship with God?
- Do you talk to your child about the gospel when you deal with behavior issues? If yes, how? If not, why not?
- Regarding outright defiance against your authority, how to you handle such occurences? (i.e. do you give warnings, do you deal differently with blatant disobedience than with tantrums or other issues, does the child's safety in the matter have an effect on your response--such as "stay out of the street" versus "pick up your toys"?)
That's all for now...gotta get ready for a chocolate taste test tonight!!
Happy weekend!
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Friday, April 3, 2009
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
soft kids
Anyone up for a discussion? (Jenna, I can see you raising your hand right now!).
This morning in my Compassion Magazine I read a story about 13-year old Melaku who, at the age of 4, was given by his mother to a couple who both lost their legs from leprosy. Melaku's mother allowed Taye and Seged to adopt the boy because she knew they needed help for daily survival.
Melaku attends school with the help of Compassion and dreams of being a doctor. For now, he fetches firewood and water, cleans the one room hut, and cares for his disabled parents.
I was recently having an email conversation with Rachel about M's sleep issues...and discussing how, even though it's tough, I really don't know the meaning of the word.
I am spoiled, pampered, living in comfort.
I am soft.
I don't know what it's like to go hungry so my kid can eat...or to work in a rice field with my baby strapped on my back...or to walk a mile to the river with my laundry piled in a pack on my head....or deal with a sleepless child in a one room hut!
I am soft.
Which made me think about Matthew. He never has to sleep in blazing heat or frigid cold...his room temp is always "just right." Even when we get into a hot or cold car, the air or heat are immediately turned on. He never experiences hunger pains because he's fed before they occur. And he has variation in his meal plan. He never has to go for long without someone or something to play with...to entertain him. He has a variety of toys to choose from. He has an abundance of clothes, and all are clean and in good-repair. His days are spent in play and fun.
I'm not necessarily saying this is bad. But is it completely good?
Of course as a mother I want to make sure he is comfortable, well-fed, clean and happy. These are blessings that I am sure any mama in any country would love to give her child. And I don't think we should feel guilty for living in a blessed country.
But what about beyond meeting our child's basic needs? How do we keep from raising soft children? How do we live in the comforts of America and yet instill strength, resilience, contentment, sacrifice, endurance and mental and physical toughness?
I sometimes wonder this...if M wanted to be a missionary in another country, would the lifestyle change be SO dramatic that it might cause him to turn back from his decision? Would the loss of the comforts that are so ingrained into our daily lives be such a shock that physical would take precedence over spiritual? Or what if he were called to defend our country in a war...guard our borders...protect the lives of others?
Would he be too soft to serve?
edited2add: better say up front that i don't lose sleep over this at night...just something i thought would be interesting to discuss!
This morning in my Compassion Magazine I read a story about 13-year old Melaku who, at the age of 4, was given by his mother to a couple who both lost their legs from leprosy. Melaku's mother allowed Taye and Seged to adopt the boy because she knew they needed help for daily survival.
Melaku attends school with the help of Compassion and dreams of being a doctor. For now, he fetches firewood and water, cleans the one room hut, and cares for his disabled parents.
I was recently having an email conversation with Rachel about M's sleep issues...and discussing how, even though it's tough, I really don't know the meaning of the word.
I am spoiled, pampered, living in comfort.
I am soft.
I don't know what it's like to go hungry so my kid can eat...or to work in a rice field with my baby strapped on my back...or to walk a mile to the river with my laundry piled in a pack on my head....or deal with a sleepless child in a one room hut!
I am soft.
Which made me think about Matthew. He never has to sleep in blazing heat or frigid cold...his room temp is always "just right." Even when we get into a hot or cold car, the air or heat are immediately turned on. He never experiences hunger pains because he's fed before they occur. And he has variation in his meal plan. He never has to go for long without someone or something to play with...to entertain him. He has a variety of toys to choose from. He has an abundance of clothes, and all are clean and in good-repair. His days are spent in play and fun.
I'm not necessarily saying this is bad. But is it completely good?
Of course as a mother I want to make sure he is comfortable, well-fed, clean and happy. These are blessings that I am sure any mama in any country would love to give her child. And I don't think we should feel guilty for living in a blessed country.
But what about beyond meeting our child's basic needs? How do we keep from raising soft children? How do we live in the comforts of America and yet instill strength, resilience, contentment, sacrifice, endurance and mental and physical toughness?
I sometimes wonder this...if M wanted to be a missionary in another country, would the lifestyle change be SO dramatic that it might cause him to turn back from his decision? Would the loss of the comforts that are so ingrained into our daily lives be such a shock that physical would take precedence over spiritual? Or what if he were called to defend our country in a war...guard our borders...protect the lives of others?
Would he be too soft to serve?
edited2add: better say up front that i don't lose sleep over this at night...just something i thought would be interesting to discuss!
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